Ask yourself, have you ever been given a card with a picture of a cat on it? Not a kitten, a cat?
No?
Of course you haven't. The world of feline greetings cards is a foul, dark place where stars new to the world are groomed for the camera then, once their youthful looks have decayed into adulthood, cast aside like a trinket from a Christmas cracker. The photography industry inducts over three hundred kittens into the ranks of its models every year, but what really happens to those that it retires?
The answer is as sinister as it is shocking. A small firm operating under the cover of a sweet shop (yes, selling sugary goodness to children) drives around the country once a year in a slightly battered ford transit van. They collect kittens, wrapped in hessian sacks, from the studios who pay them a princely sum for their services. At the end of their journey, the sacks are weighted down with stones and thrown into the Thames near Battersea. Not only do these innocent starlets drown, they do so in a daze of fear induced by the smells and barks from the dogs' home. Such a cruel end to their promising early life.
So, next time you're tempted to buy someone a card with a cute kitten peering out of a teapot, remember the pain and suffering you'll be contributing to. I for one will not be happy to receive one.
Explain yourself!
