I finally have development access at my place of employment.
This means that I can finally get the prototype of my credit-card CGI in place. I didn't manage to secure database access for it, but I'm trying to convince others that it would be a good thing. I'm kind of paranoid about keeping this stuff in text files -- I'd really like to use postgres, but I don't even think they have that here -- but if it's how it has to be done, it's how it has to be done.
(And now, the statement that has been appended to virtually every explanation of every dirty solution ever...)It's only an interim solution.