So, here I am again.
I want a few little things in life, and one of them is to be a writer. How appropriate it is not that I end up not writing when so many other things I want end up sliding from my grasp.
Part of it is that I can't juggle, of course. You sign yourself up for too much stuff, you find yourself dropping the ball. Up to a point, you drop the ball no matter what -- there's no such thing as a perfect execution -- and I reminded myself of that.
I can probably pull it through a while longer, especially with the recent...uncomplication, I suppose, is the word.
I'm no longer engaged.
It's a long story, one I probably won't tell here for various reasons, and it's not worth expressing condolences over. Life sucks at times.
Regardless of this, I have done my best to push into my work again. Part of this (the masochistic part of this, I have started to suspect) is that I'm slowly learning JavaScript even though I promised myself I would never, ever do that to myself. At my money-producing employment, there's not any way to work with Perl or anything else, so I'll shuttle along through JavaScript, trying desperately to produce the intended effects and browsing through online tutorials and specs when I have trouble. It's how I learned everything else, the read/try/read cycle.
Anyway, I'm currently working a second non-paying position now, one with a little more potential for long-term growth, perhaps. It's remote, though, so it's kind of...impersonal.
Quietly sidestepping whatever it may say about me, it's probably better for me in the long run.
So I threw on Memento and typed, transfixed, into this page to produce this entry.
I felt the need to write earlier, to write something fictive that I believe was related to some old writing I'd done a while back for a novel. I lost whatever it was on the ride home from the job, though, so I decided to ramble in here for a bit.
I'd like to return to my previous prolific journaling, but I know that's unlikely. At the very least, I'd like to drop a few entries in this thing (say, seven or so a week) and perhaps two major entries, one in each blog.
Assuming -- quite optimistically -- that the blogs are still there.
My understanding of Perl has gotten to the point that I have learned concepts in computer science wholly in Perl and then applied them to other languages, case in point JavaScript. While method calls before didn't confuse me per se, I had no idea why I was making them, and now I've got the faintest notions. It's progress of a sort.
