I lost a very close friend... not today, not recently but a while ago. It just took me some time to realize it. How? I fucked up! BIGTIME! as I did on some previous occasions. I hurt people, forced them into not being themselves. This is all my fault and I paid a very high price for my mistakes. This can't be fixed, unfortunatly. It's a very personal, private and complex issue and I'm still half confused by what exactly happened... What I know is that I lost someome I deeply cared about. Although we still talk, this isn't going to change anything. I can't go back, I can't rewind. Talking doesn't really change anything at this point. I will wrap this up as clean and quiet as possible. This will be my last entry about all this. I wish to send my sincere apologies to that one person. I know you used to read this, but I'm not sure you still do. I'm sorry for hurting you. I wish I could change anything but I can't. I want to thank you for the wonderfull time I had with you. You were the last person I wanted to see hurt. Yet I did and I have no excuse for doing that. The only person I'm angry at is myself, since I am the only person who could've prevented this from happening. This is not the time for new chances.. seconds, thirds, fourths, any chances. I will hopefully learn a valuable lesson out of this. I only wish I didn't have to learn it. Forgive me if I don't spontaneously start talking to you, since you do know well why I'd rather not.
Take care
